I'm so glad today is my birthday because yesterday completely sucked. First off I had to work and during it my friends texted me saying Micheal Jackson died. I'm surprised I didn't cry. I had to hold myself together. I've never been a huge fan of pop, but the black Micheal had some great songs including A.B.C, Thriller, Smooth Criminal, and my personal favorite Billie Jean. Everytime I hear that song I get up and dance because the kid is not my son.
Second I found out that my favorite hockey player ever, Sergei Fedorov, signed a two-year deal in KHL which means his career in the NHL is done. I knew this day was coming because he has been playing for almost 20 years, but I still wasn't prepared. Now I can no longer watch him raise the cup. Once he retires, Detroit better retire his jersey, and if he is not a first ballot hall of famer, i'll be shocked. Yesterday really sucked, hardcore. Thankfully those did not happen on my birthday. Here are a couple links to remind people of the days when these men were god,
Billie Jean video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=En-cHBv7UpA
Sergei Fedorov Highlights:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWTJzX8muUA
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wN_RmZ9WgDE
Friday, June 26, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
2009 French Open Predictions
Here at Melrose's Mullet we are interested in the French Open and are going to give our predictions/odds are who is going to win the Women's draw. Hold on a sec, no one out there probably cares about our predictions, so here are a few of the lovely ladies that we hope go far, I hope you guys enjoy.
By the way, I hope anybody wins besides Federer on the Men's side because I do not want him to tie my boy Sampras's record of 14 Grand Slam Titles, my money is on Nadal to win.
By the way, I hope anybody wins besides Federer on the Men's side because I do not want him to tie my boy Sampras's record of 14 Grand Slam Titles, my money is on Nadal to win.
Friday, May 22, 2009
NHL Playoff Awards
Here at Melrose's Mullet, we are big fans of the NHL and as the playoffs are headed to the Stanley Cup Final, we thought we would give our list of playoff awards, here are the gentlemen that stood out from the rest. I hope you enjoy brahs.
Best Playoff Beard
Best Playoff Beard
This award clearly goes to Dan Cleary of the Detroit Red Wings. Now this guy can grow some hair. This man has been down right nasty for the Wings this year and has been sporting a great beard. This is why the NHL playoffs are awesome because of the tradition and Cleary is clearly head and shoulders above the rest with his sick beard.
Best Mullet
Hands down this has to go to Simeon Varlamov. I know he is relatively knew, and he let down my Capitals in game 7 against the Pens, but he did rock the sweetest mullet. I think it is because he is from Russia and he must be good friends with our leader, Barry Melrose. Hopefully next year he wont blow it, but until then here is awesome Mullet.
Funniest Moment
Funniest Moment
This award easily goes to Scott Walker of the Carolina Hurricanes, twice. First his so called "sucker punch" on Aaron Ward was awesome. That was just a simply great punch, Ward should have been ready, it's the playoffs games are meant to be physical. Then second, to top it off Walker scores the game winning goal in Boston in OT during Game 7. That placed went silent. I laughed my ass off. Thanks Scott for shutting up my friend Tom Tom.
Biggest Cry Baby
Biggest Cry Baby
This award was the easiest to decide. Who else could it go to other than Sid "the Overrated" Kid? That's right, no one. If he does not get his way, he cries. (and he can't grow facial hair, he looks like a turrible knucklehead) I hate him with a passion. Everybody in the NHL loves him, I'd take Ovechkin over him everyday. So Sid, go shut-up before I kick the living shit out of you.
Sweetest Hockey Name
Another Red Wings gets on our list and his name is Valtteri Filppula. Now it is very tough to pronounce his name, it took awhile for me to figure out how to say it, but it is a great name. There are alot of European players in the playoffs with sweet names, but I had to pick Filppula and he has been doing well for the Wings this postseason.
Best Hitter
Best Hitter
This award goes to Niklas Kronwall of the Detroit Red Wings. His hit on Martin Havlat during Game 3 of the Western Conference Finals shows why. It was down right nasty. That was a turrible decision by the refs to throw him out. It clearly was a good hit, and the replays showed this. If an opposing player has his head down, he'll hit them. He has mastered the big hit at the offensive blue line. All players should learn from him.
Biggest Choke Artist
This was a tight battle (could have gone to the bruins or devils), but the winner is No Show Joe and the San Jose Sharks. After winning the President's Trophy, "The Best Team in the League" loses in the first round. How could you not find this funny. I laughed my ass off when they lost. I know they lost to the Ducks and Ryan Getzlaf deserves a lot more respect because he is really underrated, but Jonas Hiller was their goalie. He never played in the playoffs before. This just proves that No Show is highly overrated and sucks in the postseason.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
How Turrible the NBA Final Four Will Be
I can not express how deeply saddened I am as a Boston Celtics fan to watch the rest of the NBA playoffs. Scratch that, I will not be watching the NBA playoffs anymo. I HATE the LAKERS, I HATE the LEBRONS, I HATE the ORLANDO THREE-POINTERS, and I don't really like the NUGGETS. If I have to root for someone it would have to be the Nuggets. That team intrigues me becasue of the BIRDMAN and MELO. Birdmans' tattoos are sweet and his hairdo is awesome. I've really jumped on his bandwagon, and I would take Melo' over any of the other draft picks from 2003. The only thing though is that they have to play the Lakers and I can not watch that, unless they are up 24 in LA and beating the Celtics during the NBA Finals. I despise how everyone thinks Sasha "A road cone can play better defense than me" Vujacic is good or the fact that Odom, Bynum or Gasol are excellent players. They are all overrated and don't even get me started on Kobe's new movie. (Kobe just come out and say that you are the most selfish player in the NBA and got away with rape.)
Now onto to the Eastern Conference, this is the worst match-up ever. I do not want to see Anderson Varejo slap anymo butts. Honestly if one of his teammates falls down on the other side of the court, he rushes over and picks him up and slaps his ass. Just come out Brah, seriously. The Magic think they have the best center in the league in Duh...Duh...Duh-White Howard, but he sucks. All they do is shoot three pointers, they are the Dukies of the NBA. He-Doo Turk-A-Glue needs to go back to Europe. So as the the NBA season wines down, and nobody is watching the NBA finals because when it's Kobe vs. Lebron, (this match-up was already pre-determined by Stern and Donaghy after the Olympics) I'll be watching the NHL playoffs and watchin my Red Wings repeat.
Now onto to the Eastern Conference, this is the worst match-up ever. I do not want to see Anderson Varejo slap anymo butts. Honestly if one of his teammates falls down on the other side of the court, he rushes over and picks him up and slaps his ass. Just come out Brah, seriously. The Magic think they have the best center in the league in Duh...Duh...Duh-White Howard, but he sucks. All they do is shoot three pointers, they are the Dukies of the NBA. He-Doo Turk-A-Glue needs to go back to Europe. So as the the NBA season wines down, and nobody is watching the NBA finals because when it's Kobe vs. Lebron, (this match-up was already pre-determined by Stern and Donaghy after the Olympics) I'll be watching the NHL playoffs and watchin my Red Wings repeat.
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Congrats Sir Mullet
Congratulations to our founder Barry Melrose and his 31 years to his wonderful wife Cindy. Today is there wedding anniversary. Making it that far with a man who still rocks a mullet is incredible. As a hockey fan and playing it for most of my life, I do not think I could find a wife who would be there for me for 31 years while having a mullet. That is impressive Cindy. On another note, Barry what is up with you tanning? Hockey players don't tan, but you still are the man. Here is to you Cindy and Barry!
Monday, April 20, 2009
The Melrose's Mullet Mock NFL Draft
I know all of you have been waiting for this and here it is: our mock draft.
1. Lions – Shane Falco, QB (The Replacements). The Lions are going quarterback with the #1 pick, and since they are the Lions, they will pick a guy worse than Joey Harrington.
2. Rams – Billy Bob, OL (Varsity Blues). The Rams need to bolster their offensive line, and adding Billy Bob at guard should give Stephen Jackson more holes to run through.
3. Kansas City – Jumbo, OT (The Replacements). The Chiefs add a big left tackle to protect Matt Cassel’s blind side.
4. Seattle – Ronnie Bass, QB (Remember the Titans). With Matt Hasselbeck getting up there in age, the Seahawks get his eventual replacement. Bass has a strong arm, but has had some issues pitching the ball
5. Cleveland - Charlie Tweeder, WR (Varsity Blues). The Browns add a sure handed receiver to play with Braylon 'rock hands' Edwards. Then Tweeder will drink some beer.
6. Cincinnati - Jamal and Andre Jackson, OG (The Replacements). These brothers come as a package deal and should be a great help to Cincinnati’s awful O-Line. They should fit right in with the rest of the team as well.
7. Oakland – Forrest Gump, KR (Forrest Gump). We all know that Al Davis loves him some fast players and there is no one faster than Forrest Gump. While he may not be able to play receiver right away, he should be able to be the best kick returner in the league immediately. Even though he isn’t a smart man, he knows how to play football.
8. Jacksonville Jaguars – Jonathan Moxin, QB (Varsity Blues). Garrard is in his 30s and struggled last season. Moxin can watch a year or two from the bench before taking over the starting job.
9. Green Bay Packers – Bobby Boucher, ILB/OLB (The Waterboy). With the Packers switching to the 3-4, they need to bolster their linebacker core. Boucher can play both ILB and OLB, will be a menace to block and will provide the team with high quality H20.
10. San Francisco 49ers – Luther Lavay, OLB (Any Given Sunday). The 49ers need a pass rusher and Lavay is one of the top pass rushers in the draft.
11. Buffalo Bills – Wendell Brown, RB (Varsity Blues). With Marshawn in legal trouble, the Bills snag a very good running back here. Brown will carry the team inside the 10 and then Trent Edwards will get them to the endzone.
12. Denver Broncos – Steve Lattimer, DE/DT (The Program). Lattimer is a freak that can anchor a 3-4 defense. He could go top 5, but because of possible off field issues, he drops here.
13. Washington Redskins – Willie Beamen, QB (Any Given Sunday). Not impressed with Jason Campbell so far, the Redskins draft another QB. Beamen is a playmaker but his ego tends to get a bit inflated and he can’t read a playbook.
14. New Orleans Saints – Petey Jones, DB (Remember the Titans). The Saints desperately need defensive help and Petey can come in and provide that. His ego grows with each play he makes, but he will quit on the team if he gets called for holding.
15. Houston Texans – Julius Campbell, DE (Remember the Titans). Campbell should provide an imposing presence opposite of Mario Williams. STRONG SIDE!
16. San Diego Chargers – Ivory Christian, DE (Friday Night Lights). Christian is a huge upgrade to the Chargers defensive line.
17. New York Jets – Rico Dynamite, QB (Napoleon Dynamite). Had the Jets had Rico in the 4th quarter, they would have division champions. No doubt in my mind.
18. Denver Broncos – Daniel Bateman, LB (The Replacements). The Broncos need an ILB for their 3-4 and Bateman is a smart football player, similar to Tedy Bruschi.
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Paul Crewe, QB (The Longest Yard). In need of QB, the Bucs take the man that led an improbable upset over the guards. If Crewe can get a work release from prison, he is a great pick here.
20. Detroit Lions – Louie Lastik, OL (Remember the Titans). They got their QB with the first pick, now they pick up a lineman to help protect him.
21. Philadelphia Eagles – Brian Murphy, TE (The Replacements). The Eagles add a playmaker for McNabb. McNabb won’t have to worry about his new TE throwing him under the bus because he doesn’t say a whole lot.
22. Minnesota Vikings – Rod Tidwell, WR (Jerry Maguire). Tidwell gives the Vikings a reliable receiver, as long as the show him the money.
23. New England Patriots - Charles Jefferson, LB (Fast Times at Ridgemont High). Jefferson replaces Mike Vrabel at OLB and Bill Belichick is working on getting Jeff Spicoli to destroy Jefferson’s car and blame it on the Jets.
24. Atlanta Falcons - Andre Krimm, DL (Necessary Roughness). Good value pick for the Falcons here. Krimm gives them good depth on the defensive line and he can be the team tutor.
25. Miami Dolphins - Alvin Mack, LB (The Program). Mack could have gone in the top half of the draft, but falls this far because of injury problems. If he is healthy, it’s a great pick for Miami
26. Baltimore Ravens - Deacon Moss, WR (The Longest Yard). Baltimore gives Joe Flacco another receiver to stare down.
27. Indianapolis Colts – Darnell Jefferson, RB (The Program). With Addai disappointing the last couple of seasons, the Colts address their need at RB. Jefferson has a lot of upside and could be a star in the NFL
28. Buffalo Bills – Bud Light, OL (The Program). Buffalo’s overhaul of their offensive line continues. Bud Light should be able to come in and play LT right away.
29. New York Giants - Daniel Ruetigger, LB/DE (Rudy). Just because the Giants fucking would.
30. Tennessee Titans – Stefan Djordevic, CB (All the Right Moves). While very talented, Djordevic falls almost out of the first round because he is only five feet tall.
31. Arizona Cardinals – Julian Washington, RB (Any Given Sunday). The Cardinals had the corpse of Edgerrin James at running back last season. Washington going to Arizona gives the Cards one of the best offenses in the NFL.
32. Pittsburgh Steelers – Manumana, C (Necessary Roughness). The only knock on the Steelers last season was that their offensive line sucked. Manumana helps shore it up and keep Roethlisberger on his feet.
1. Lions – Shane Falco, QB (The Replacements). The Lions are going quarterback with the #1 pick, and since they are the Lions, they will pick a guy worse than Joey Harrington.
2. Rams – Billy Bob, OL (Varsity Blues). The Rams need to bolster their offensive line, and adding Billy Bob at guard should give Stephen Jackson more holes to run through.
3. Kansas City – Jumbo, OT (The Replacements). The Chiefs add a big left tackle to protect Matt Cassel’s blind side.
4. Seattle – Ronnie Bass, QB (Remember the Titans). With Matt Hasselbeck getting up there in age, the Seahawks get his eventual replacement. Bass has a strong arm, but has had some issues pitching the ball
5. Cleveland - Charlie Tweeder, WR (Varsity Blues). The Browns add a sure handed receiver to play with Braylon 'rock hands' Edwards. Then Tweeder will drink some beer.
6. Cincinnati - Jamal and Andre Jackson, OG (The Replacements). These brothers come as a package deal and should be a great help to Cincinnati’s awful O-Line. They should fit right in with the rest of the team as well.
7. Oakland – Forrest Gump, KR (Forrest Gump). We all know that Al Davis loves him some fast players and there is no one faster than Forrest Gump. While he may not be able to play receiver right away, he should be able to be the best kick returner in the league immediately. Even though he isn’t a smart man, he knows how to play football.
8. Jacksonville Jaguars – Jonathan Moxin, QB (Varsity Blues). Garrard is in his 30s and struggled last season. Moxin can watch a year or two from the bench before taking over the starting job.
9. Green Bay Packers – Bobby Boucher, ILB/OLB (The Waterboy). With the Packers switching to the 3-4, they need to bolster their linebacker core. Boucher can play both ILB and OLB, will be a menace to block and will provide the team with high quality H20.
10. San Francisco 49ers – Luther Lavay, OLB (Any Given Sunday). The 49ers need a pass rusher and Lavay is one of the top pass rushers in the draft.
11. Buffalo Bills – Wendell Brown, RB (Varsity Blues). With Marshawn in legal trouble, the Bills snag a very good running back here. Brown will carry the team inside the 10 and then Trent Edwards will get them to the endzone.
12. Denver Broncos – Steve Lattimer, DE/DT (The Program). Lattimer is a freak that can anchor a 3-4 defense. He could go top 5, but because of possible off field issues, he drops here.
13. Washington Redskins – Willie Beamen, QB (Any Given Sunday). Not impressed with Jason Campbell so far, the Redskins draft another QB. Beamen is a playmaker but his ego tends to get a bit inflated and he can’t read a playbook.
14. New Orleans Saints – Petey Jones, DB (Remember the Titans). The Saints desperately need defensive help and Petey can come in and provide that. His ego grows with each play he makes, but he will quit on the team if he gets called for holding.
15. Houston Texans – Julius Campbell, DE (Remember the Titans). Campbell should provide an imposing presence opposite of Mario Williams. STRONG SIDE!
16. San Diego Chargers – Ivory Christian, DE (Friday Night Lights). Christian is a huge upgrade to the Chargers defensive line.
17. New York Jets – Rico Dynamite, QB (Napoleon Dynamite). Had the Jets had Rico in the 4th quarter, they would have division champions. No doubt in my mind.
18. Denver Broncos – Daniel Bateman, LB (The Replacements). The Broncos need an ILB for their 3-4 and Bateman is a smart football player, similar to Tedy Bruschi.
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers – Paul Crewe, QB (The Longest Yard). In need of QB, the Bucs take the man that led an improbable upset over the guards. If Crewe can get a work release from prison, he is a great pick here.
20. Detroit Lions – Louie Lastik, OL (Remember the Titans). They got their QB with the first pick, now they pick up a lineman to help protect him.
21. Philadelphia Eagles – Brian Murphy, TE (The Replacements). The Eagles add a playmaker for McNabb. McNabb won’t have to worry about his new TE throwing him under the bus because he doesn’t say a whole lot.
22. Minnesota Vikings – Rod Tidwell, WR (Jerry Maguire). Tidwell gives the Vikings a reliable receiver, as long as the show him the money.
23. New England Patriots - Charles Jefferson, LB (Fast Times at Ridgemont High). Jefferson replaces Mike Vrabel at OLB and Bill Belichick is working on getting Jeff Spicoli to destroy Jefferson’s car and blame it on the Jets.
24. Atlanta Falcons - Andre Krimm, DL (Necessary Roughness). Good value pick for the Falcons here. Krimm gives them good depth on the defensive line and he can be the team tutor.
25. Miami Dolphins - Alvin Mack, LB (The Program). Mack could have gone in the top half of the draft, but falls this far because of injury problems. If he is healthy, it’s a great pick for Miami
26. Baltimore Ravens - Deacon Moss, WR (The Longest Yard). Baltimore gives Joe Flacco another receiver to stare down.
27. Indianapolis Colts – Darnell Jefferson, RB (The Program). With Addai disappointing the last couple of seasons, the Colts address their need at RB. Jefferson has a lot of upside and could be a star in the NFL
28. Buffalo Bills – Bud Light, OL (The Program). Buffalo’s overhaul of their offensive line continues. Bud Light should be able to come in and play LT right away.
29. New York Giants - Daniel Ruetigger, LB/DE (Rudy). Just because the Giants fucking would.
30. Tennessee Titans – Stefan Djordevic, CB (All the Right Moves). While very talented, Djordevic falls almost out of the first round because he is only five feet tall.
31. Arizona Cardinals – Julian Washington, RB (Any Given Sunday). The Cardinals had the corpse of Edgerrin James at running back last season. Washington going to Arizona gives the Cards one of the best offenses in the NFL.
32. Pittsburgh Steelers – Manumana, C (Necessary Roughness). The only knock on the Steelers last season was that their offensive line sucked. Manumana helps shore it up and keep Roethlisberger on his feet.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Ana Ivanovic
It's a sad day today here at Melrose's Mullet. Waking up this morning I was severely upset over the news that Ana Ivanovic lost at the Australian Open this morning. This means I can't look at her smokin body (cough..fashion) and seeing her play. Having a huge crush on her, I realize there is only one way to get over my tears and that is to post these cute pictures of her looking hot as hell. The great part about her is that she is only two years older than I. Enjoy the beauty that is Ana:
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